I will write more detailed posts about the things I experienced on this recent trip to Central America, but for now while I’m recovering and getting organized (read: catching up on my two issues of Real Simple magazine and countless episodes of New Girl), here is a quick recap of the somewhat bizarre month I spent traversing Mexico, Guatemala, and Nicaragua.
Antigua, Guatemala
Types of Wounds Acquired
Blisters (as usual)
Mosquito bites
Unimpressive volcano boarding scrapes
Splinters
Mysterious cargo ship bruise on upper thigh
Loss of intestinal function
Bruise on face from violent vomiting incident
Bruise on ego from Guatemala City pickpocketing incident
Our Collective Spanish Vocabulary
Bano (bathroom)
Necessito (I need)
Cargedor (phone charger)
En serio? (seriously?)
Conejo (rabbit)
Albondigas (meatballs) (from an episode of How I Met Your Mother)
Big Corn Island, Nicaragua
Activities I’d Never Performed Before
Volcano boarding
Visiting a waterfall
Fishing
Vomiting while fishing
Riding in the back of a pickup truck
Visiting a bat cave
Petting a bat’s head
Innertubing down a river
Hitching a ride on a cargo ship
Consuming Pepto Bismol
Crying while snorkeling
Activities Reluctantly Performed Despite the Fact that I was 85% Certain They Would Kill Me:
Snorkeling
Volcano Boarding
Setting foot on numerous boats
Innertubing
Being in Guatemala City
Leon, Nicaragua
Activities That Did Actually Almost Kill Me:
Bus ride with Manuel, an extremely ill and stubborn man who, instead of pulling over and letting someone else drive, proceeded to take frequent vomiting breaks and speed up into the pitch black curving streets when we all started begging him to stop before he killed us
Being in Guatemala City
Languages in Which I Recited the Hail Mary During Manuel’s Reign of Terror:
English
French
Google Searches Performed:
“life insurance dying in another country”
“how to use a washboard sink”
“google translate ‘seasick’ ”
“stomach gross Central America”
“stomach parasites am i dying”
“foot parasites am i dying”
“savage garden i knew i loved you lyrics”
Cascada de Agua Azul, Mexico
Things that B Slept Through
The night I spent vomiting on Little Corn Island
Drunk Irish man having sex with at least one (but possibly two) girls at 3:30am in our hostel dorm room
Most of our overnight bus rides
The Bus’s Playlist on Our Journey From San Salvador to Managua
Bonnie Tyler, “Total Eclipse of the Heart”
Various 1980s hair bands
Britney Spears, “Hit Me Baby One More Time” and “Not A Girl, Not Yet a Woman”
Sabrina Salerno, “Boys Boys Boys” (warning: that link/music video is rated PG13 due to frequent [and totally avoidable?!] nip slips)
I figure none of the men will continue to read further now that I’ve directed them to video footage of nip slips, so we’ll end here.
Face bruise from vomiting incident. I need to know how this happened?
Congrats on surviving!
Colleen Brynn recently posted..How Going To School Has Been Like Traveling (And Why You Should Try It)
I vomited so violently that my face went forward and smacked the side of the toilet and I had a small bruise on my cheek. WIN
great lists it seems like you felt the same way about central america that I did about India
georgeonthego recently posted..Top 5 Reasons Why I Love Being an ALT
I hope you didn’t almost die as much as I did?
i love that you googled about life insurance if you die there.
but i love even more that you were forced to hear britney spears on the bus. id be in heaven.
Megan recently posted..Spending an Afternoon by the Sea in Jurmala, Latvia